Just put it in the bag

This is what we worked on all weekend during General Conference. I didn't realized how out of date our 72 hour kits were until I pulled out Mason's and found diapers still inside. Then I opened ours and found food that had been expired for years. You'd think, growing up the way I did, I would have perfect 72 hour packs and be prepared for any disaster. I'm learning that it's a work in progress... and you can't stop working or preparing.


Though not perfected, I have come up with a good system to keep everything current and rotated. I started getting overwhelmed trying to find the best way to pack it all. After several calls and questions to my dad he gave me the best advice: "Just put it in the bag".

I still think it will be easier to organize once the boys are big enough to carry their own bags. I finally had to realize that one pack for all emergencies is pretty idealistic. One of my favorite achievements from this process is coming up with better basic car kit. We keep it in the closet and put it in whichever car we are headed out in for an adventure. It has all the basics and I've already used it a few times (and, here's the key, replaced what I used.)

My name is Ashley and I am a nerd.

Getting festive for St. Pats

The basement was finally ready for paint so we went bold and green for St. Patrick's. (These pictures tone down the "spring green" quite a bit.)

Just wait until you see what we paint for Easter!


{I spy Lightening McQueen underwear}

 

 

This is one of my favorite holidays so we had lots of fun getting ready throughout the week. We had company so I decided against the traditional corned beef, red potatoes, and cabbage. Instead we packed in tons of green veggies and had fajitas and quinoa salad. Oh, and spinach muffins but I had to fill them with pudding to encourage consumption.

I searched high and low for green punch. Not just any green punch but the kind from my childhood. It comes in a milk-style jug and tastes like melted popsicles. I've truly been craving it for years. I thought this would be the perfect occasion to indulge but alas, it was no where to be found. As I inquired at different grocery stores I gathered it may have been off the shelves for the years. I was tempted to buy as many green popsicles as I could find and try to recreate the flavor but gave in and just made lemonade. 

now breathe

Even though I declared January to be stress-free and project-free I forgot to tell the rest of the world. Oh well. This month we had my Dad's retirement party and Emily's baby shower and the preparations took all month. In the middle of planning and preparation, Amy was hospitalized for a bit. Even though there wasn't a terrible amount of things to be done, it seemed to be a pretty packed month. Even just the waiting for the week to arrive seemed to make each day busy and full.

At last, it's all over. It was a wonderful weekend and certainly worth all the work. Dad's party was over the top. A horse and wagon transported him from work to the church. We decorated the gym for the party. There he was greeted by friends, family, co workers, and representatives from the church. They had a musical number, tributes, plaques from the First Presidency and the LDS Family Services Commissioner, presents, and FOOD! April, his amazing secretary, planned a huge luau. My projects were Grand kid interviews and a video slide show. At the end Mom arranged for a bag pipe performance and gave Dad a four wheeler to ride home on.

Friday night we had an adult only dinner for relatives at Dad's favorite place, Sizzler. Nate pointed out we've never gone out to eat with just the adults before. It was nice, but I ate way too much at the luau to be hungry. This day was also our wedding anniversary so we jokingly thanked everyone for coming for the special occasion.

Uncle Larry, Aunt Dorian, and Misty stayed with us. They are the easiest guests and so delightful to be around. I'm trying to come up with more reasons they should come visit. Perhaps I can convince them to stay permanently.

Saturday was Emily's baby shower. She's probably the most gorgeous pregnant girl ever. It's been a hard pregnancy for her and we can't wait for her little girl to arrive. So we had more family and friends gather at Kristi's for brunch. She was given some amazing gifts, especially meaningful blankets. One was made by Grandma's sister, Hazel, who had gone blind. She would count the stitches and then at the end of a row would move a bean from one pocket to the other so that she could keep track of the rows and know when to change colors.

All in all it was wonderful. I'm also glad it's over. I'm tired ;)
Since I can't even think about hooking up my camera, here's a picture that I already had on my computer from the slide show. I love it.

Mom (pregnant with Nate) and Dad. Kristi, Ben, Lisa, and Dave.

Project: December

 Twas the month before Christmas and all through the house not a creature was stirring except for ME. Many late nights, nap times, and a few early mornings (I'll be the first to admit I am not a morning person) were devoted to random projects. I was very glad to get Mason's and Eli's stockings done in time for the Big Night. I started making quilted stockings in high school and then a couple years ago learned how to make the crazy quilt design like these ones. (Krystal and Kira both adjusted to the process much much more naturally). I've only made one a year for the past two years so I was behind. They don't actually take that long, it's just not a kid friendly activity. To show my favorite part, check out the decorative top stitching. I love my sewing machine.

Project time out: What do you do when your son yells that he got his head stuck in the banister?
A. Help him immediately like any good parent would
B. Grab a camera
C. Laugh and shout for your spouse to come see/laugh

I did all these things but in order of C, B, and then eventually A.

Another big project was helping Mom make a cook book that contained her mother's family famous recipes.

 Also, not a project that should have taken very long. The final product was different than what either of us had in mind when we started. Also, Grandma's cursive might as well been Egyptian. I couldn't decipher a lot of it, so Mom would translate as we went. I was very proud that we got the books done and shipped with time (okay, less time that we were aiming for) to spare. 

I look like a total goon here but there is a reason I'm so happy. I've been promising Jason a denim quilt since before we were married. To my credit, I've worked on it a bit here and there all these years, as has my mom for a quilt for Dad. This year was the year to git er done. Well, not really really. We both only completed the quilt tops. But at least they look like blankets now. Kinda.

My friend Kira organized a Kid Activity exchange. Awesome idea. Each mom makes one activity a bunch of times and then we swap so each mom has a whole box of different fun things for the kiddo.  If I remember right the rules were make an activity for a 2-4 year old, it should fit in a ziploc bag (any size) and shouldn't cost a ton, like around a dollar each. I was bummed to see that some activities were card packs from the dollar store, but that still technically fits the rules. Most the activities we got were fun and creative. I made activity blocks with pictures to help suggest an imagination game. I typed up a direction sheet with tips and variations. Cool right? yeah, Lisa's been making these for years. Jason, as usual, saved the day by making the cubes at work out of scrap lumber so my cost was pretty much just time. 

I think that just about wraps up the month. I'm sure I'm forgetting something, but some things we block out on purpose. Oh, I discovered "White Trash" snack mix and sure tried hard to replicate Christina's awesome recipe. Sorry to the neighbors that received the proof that I didn't succeed.  I'll have to compile a Santa picture post. No joke, he showed up at our church party, and Mason's school, Home Depot, and even at our very own house on Christmas Eve. He even sent Mason some personalized emails. Seriously? Seriously! Love love love the holidays. Honestly, mostly love when they are over. No wonder it's hard to focus on the real meaning of Christmas when there is so much going on.

So on that cheery note, Love from Jason and Ashley

snapshot

A post titled "snapshot" with no pictures. Yup. I miss writing. I will eventually find a way to keep all the balls in the air. Until then, blogging has taken a back seat. However, I need to write. For my sake, for recording, for whatever. So I'm introducing "snapshots". They'll be quick, dirty, and grammatically incorrect. Just enough to record what life is like. Just enough to let a little steam out of the kettle so I don't explode.

Today. Mason slept in for the first time in ages. Mason slept in his own bed, all night for the first time in AGES people! Eli coughed a bit during the night but also slept really well. Jason, wounded from another grueling game of church basketball, didn't sleep so well. Yet he was off to work so early it still felt like night. He's always so good at saying goodbye. It scares the heck out of me every time (quick joke my mom told me tonight: a boy asks his father "What is heck?" the wise father responds "it's a place where there is no Gosh").

I actually had to wake Mace up to get ready for school. On Monday the bus driver said they'd be coming later since the route was pretty short. By later she must have meant even earlier. We ran out to the bus, which was blocking the way of the garbage truck, which was blocking the way of another bus. Our street has never been so busy. As the bus pulled away I realized Mason hadn't brushed his teeth. It bugged me so much I was tempted to show up at his classroom with a toothbrush. I'm not even going to admit that for the first/last/only time ever he also had a pop tart for breakfast. I didn't go grocery shopping as planned since Jason was out late (waaaaay late) getting beat up playing ball. We were out of milk. What a way to start the day.

Visiting teaching, grocery shopping, phone calls, errand running, and then home to meet Mason getting off the bus. He said "My teacher said: Mason you don't talk very much". Oh Mace. I also spent about 20 minutes at the gas station discussing the best way to get to the Grand Canyon and rating the "curviness" of hwy 14. Spent part of the middle of the day falling dozing on the floor while the boys threw blocks at my head. I love having two. I'll say it a million times. I love how they make each other laugh. I love how Mason will run into their room squealing "Good Morning Eli!". I love how Eli brightens at the sight of his brother.

More time spent washing bottles full of peaches and jam, cleaning out a few dresser drawers, resubscribing to the newspaper, and playing tag. 

Jason came home, still limping. We talked about our plans for the long weekend, the end of the summer, the rest of the year, the rest of our lives. Yep, have it all planned out. Don't be jealous.

I ran to work. It was so hot. I try not to complain. I hate wearing shoes though. I'd never complain if I could just wear flip flops. Ditching the hideous uniform all together would be nice. Mom's flying standby to Reno tomorrow. Checked the flights. Listed her. Checked her in.

Ran home. Made dinner. Bathed the boys. Ran back to work. Talked with Kacy. He's a very calming influence. And we work well together. Drove to mom's to drop off her tickets. Sat around telling jokes with mom and dad and pretended we weren't tired. Came home. Everyone is asleep but my head is racing so I type.

The end.

I never want to forget mom retelling a spectacular scene she saw flying back from Oregon. So amazing she wanted to stand and proclaim "Behold!" to all the passengers too busy on their iPhones to notice the miracle outside the window.

I always want to remember dad's pleased expression when I retold one of his classic jokes and made mom burst out laughing. You know the one. The man goes into his therapist and says "What is wrong with me? I'm a wigwam I'm a teepee I'm a wigwam I'm a teepee". The Therapist says "Well it is clear that you are two tense!"

I love the way the kids look when they are sleeping. Curled up or splayed out. Pouty lips and stillness.

I love the catharsis of purging words out of my head. Fingers move without thought. Too fast at first. Slowing down and I think I can rest now. Perhaps unedited thought dumping is the answer to my insomnia.

So close and yet...

Anybody want a greenhouse?
Yeah, me too.

Jason's friend offered him his awesome little greenhouse. We were so excited. It was surprisingly devastating to not get it...in one piece, that is. I'm just glad I didn't have to witness it exploding into hundreds of pieces on the freeway. Also glad no major damage to other vehicles occurred. Still bummed...

RyRy turns 8!

My nephew Ryan turned 8! Mason is close with almost all of his cousins, and he and Ryan have a special relationship. Perhaps it's all the hand-me-downs, perhaps it's the countless hours playing together. Perhaps it's because Mason really needs an older brother and Ryan wants a little brother. Along with celebrating his birthday, we also celebrated his decision to be baptized. My camera died missed some great photo opportunities (Kris? Hook me up?). Here's the cake I made Ry and here's Mason outside the church right before the baptism (in a very typical Mason pose).

Betty Bargainfinder strikes again

I love thrifting and yard-saling. It's getting to the point that I don't get much since I finally have my house all furnished and mostly decorated. Now that I work early Saturday morning I have been taking the long way home because I just.can't.resist.

Here are some things I'm just so happy about:

all the blocks for $1 (I spy Eli chilling out)

Eye sore? yeah but Ethan Allen headboard, free table, and antique cabinet from DI "make me HAPPY".

I scored this lawn mower from a yard sale. I excitedly called Jason since we've been trying to find a used one.
Me: Guess guess guess what I got?
Starr: What?
Me: A LAWNMOWER! For cheap!
Starr: Sweet. Does it work?
Me: Uh, yeah. They said it did.
Starr: You didn't start it up before you bought it?
Me: Uh, no.
Starr: But it works?
Me: Yeah... probably...
Starr: Is it propelled?
Me: Huh?
Starr: Does it look like it helps move itself foward?
Me: Uh, I'm looking at it and yeah... no... just wheels, no extra handle... so no.
Starr: Okay... What brand is it?
Me: I've never heard of the brand.
Starr: Okay. Um...
Me: It has a bag..
Starr: Okay bud. I'll look at it when I get home from work.

I realized it was a total impulse purchase but I was SO EXCITED when I saw it. I spent most of the rest of that day trying to get it to start, nearly ripping my arm out of its socket, cleaning it up, and eventually mowing the back yard. When Jason got home I tried to play it cool and aloofly mentioned I got it started as if it was no big deal. "Oh cool" was his response. I think he meant "how freaking awesome!"

Education

This weekend I learned:


There is a much easier way to make cake balls.
Mason responds to my warnings better if I count backwards from 5 instead of from 1 to 3.
Beans really have rocks in them. Mason and I found 4.
100 lbs of wheat fill 2 and 3/4 buckets.


Eli thinks he wants 6 oz but his stomach only fits about 4.
I can wake up hours before the kids and not hate it.
Marshaling an aircraft makes me smile for 72 hours straight.
The average blanching time for cauliflower and broccoli is about 3 minutes.
If Jason signs up to substitute primary I will end up teaching.
4 year olds are really really wiggly.
One pot of beans feeds three once, five the next day, and then one more, and then three more. There is one bowl left over last I checked. Luckily not everyone was hungry.
Similarly, 1/2 batch of bread makes countless Doughjons (scones), three round loaves, and feeds everyone.
I can feed an unexpected crowd, clean up, get the kids to bed amidst the chaos, and really enjoy it all.
Games upstairs, movie down, and I pick alone time in the den.

Marching on

It's mid March already! I keep thinking that I'll catch up with writing and the other bazillion projects when life slows down. It's faulty thinking. Life just keeps picking up speed. Now that I have 2 minutes to sit and type my mind has gone blank. So much for meaningful essays. Here's a few random blurbs instead:

I have two incredible boys. One is almost three, one is three months. Guess which one sleeps through the night and which one wakes up frequently? It's not the obvious answer.

I get to talk to Lindsey weekly now. We found a time that we're both available and can chat for a bit while she drives home and my kids are asleep. It's wonderful to be current with your bestie. We'll always be close even if we live on opposite sides of the world and never talk, but it's really great to be in regular communication. Also, she brought me chocolate covered pretzels and a greeting card as big as place mat. That's why she's the best. 

We bought a huge 60lbs bucket of sprouts. Have I written about my sprouting obsession yet? Ooooh. I don't think I have. I will soon.

I FINALLY made cake balls after hearing everyone rave about them forever. They weren't perfect, but it was fun. Yes, cake balls are indeed noteworthy.

I asked Mason where he wanted to go for his birthday in a couple months. I suggested the beach or the zoo. He said he'd wanted to go to Kristi's house. 

Also noteworthy that Jason and I fixed our garbage disposal. It made me feel very handy. We are like real homeowners now! Really though, doing stuff like that together is better than any date out on the town. We're getting ready to plant our garden. We'll probably fall deeply in love with each other all over again :) Cooperation and hard work were the things that started our relationship and also the things that seem to draw us closer together still.

I was very recently telling my mom how overwhelmingly happy I was staying at home with my kids. I didn't want to go anywhere, not even the library. Not because I was too tired or scared to go out, I just didn't want to. I gloried in our simple life and quiet days. We were so content. And then a random job opportunity came up. And for some reason I went for it. And for some reason I got it. And for some reason I'm loving it. It's been a whirlwind of changes but I think it's going to work out. Craziness.

Amy took Eli for a whole night. Even though he's a great sleeper I slept so well knowing she was "on duty" and didn't even get sick to my stomach being separated from him. Ironically he woke up several times during the night which is very unlike him. Poor Ames. Oops, I just gave away the answer to the first question. 

Eli's baby blessing was a few weeks ago. Both sides of the family came for the occasion. We were only missing four brothers out of the 18 combined siblings. Mason loved being entertained by all his cousins. When he woke up the next day he wandered around the quiet empty house asking where his friends were.

And because no entry is complete without a picture, here's the fam. I just realized I look absolutely nothing like my mother.

the view from here

These are the thing I spend my days looking at:


1. Lucky Eli in a sling. I love having him close and also having two free hands. (thanks again Misty)

2. Mason playing in the backyard by himself. Sad, huh? Juggling the needs of the two boys is tricky. So I put Mason in the backyard and watch him from my open bedroom window while nursing Eli covered in blankets to keep covered from the cold air.

3. One of my "keep busy" projects. I've found it helps to have something to work on when we're up late at night or when I'm feeling less than productive. I've been working on converting all my home videos from VHS to DVD. My dresser is a jumble of cords and electronics.

4. Here's Mr. E giving me one of those looks. I spy the laptop on the bed. I'm on it a lot when I'm sitting around doing nothing (ha! I mean nursing all the time).

5. A view I need to see more often. The weather has been so cold that I don't dare take the kids out much lately. Thank heavens for the treadmill...Mason likes to take a turn and the sound puts Eli right to sleep.

6. Mace Face flashing that smile that melts me every time.

Nesting

I've always thought that the "nesting instinct" was similar to pregnancy cravings, or colic; a term that is thrown at every similar characteristic. The words are used too generally and given too much vague significance. Pregnant women are totally crazy but I don't think that means we should go around labeling all our behaviors. I guess I've just always been annoyed when hormones are blamed for behavior. Ladies, let's take some accountability for how we act.

Anyway... I've been going on a cleaning/organized kick around the house and Jason is certainly enjoying teasing me about nesting. Whether nesting is legit or not, the fruits of my labor are satisfying. Too bad I haven't spent more of my energy on detailing the cars or knitting baby booties.

This is how I nest :)

The Gear

The Storage Room

To be fair I alphabetized my sauce and seasoning packets. Even I smirked at myself. I call it organization meets boredom. Call it what you want.

A rare productive day

Once upon a Saturday I had a rare productive day. By noon I had picked up my Bountiful Basket, had a pressure canner full of bottled chicken, the extra chicken was in the crock pot for dinner, banana bread in the oven, a dehydrator full of apples and bananas, AND a happy toddler. Take THAT Martha Stewart. Usually any undertaking of that sort means sacrificing Mason's happiness, my sanity, and certainly the cleanliness of my house. For some reason it all just worked that day. I started wondering what else I could conquer.

Okay, I bribed Mason with a donut. His first donut ever. He liked the sprinkles. I also let him stay in his pajamas. He loves his pajamas.


I'm also failing to mention that there was a scary moment when I was certain my obituary would read "death by pressure canner" and I caused a bit of home damage. That is why the title of this post is not: a rare successful day. But close enough.

Many hands make...the grass greener

When Jason left for the summer, our plans were for me to finish up a few things, wait for him to get settled into corporate housing, and then go join him shortly. Well, things didn't turn out like we planned. He ended up spending something like 80 days in a hotel, my little projects turned into big problems, and other unavoidable delays prevented my departure from Cedar.

Finally things were coming together and my days of single parenthood looked to have an end in sight. The only thing holding us back was the sprinkler project.

When we bought the house we were told it had functioning front and back sprinklers, which we found out it didn't when the snow melted (do I sound bitter? I'm trying to get over this, but it's been hard). So before I could leave I needed to get our landscaping guy to finish his trenches, finish the sprinklers, and lay sod. It ended up being way stressful and taking much longer than anticipated.

But I am choosing to focus on the positive parts of the ordeal. Time was out and I was down to the wire to get my grass in. Truly, the car was packed and I was ready to leave the next morning and the sod still hadn't been delivered. Thank heavens for amazing family and friends that showed up that evening and helped me get it in. I was so grateful to have people I could call for help.

My brother Nate was especially helpful and I don't think the project would have gotten done if it wasn't for him. I was so proud of my little nephews who showed up to help, even though the sod rolls weighed more than they did. My sister Kristi even showed up early to help me finish last minute things in the house. Her girls brought friends to help...I'm sure laying sod is what every teenager wants to do in their spare time. My home teacher Jason and long time friend Terral were both indispensable. Tons of people offered to help as well before and after.

Now when ever we enjoy our new backyard, I'll be filled with gratitude and reminded of the people that are my "people" for a reason.

(and if I get home and the grass is dead I will have a come apart)

I would be amiss without mentioning my neighbors, who are helpful beyond helpful. This picture is of them mowing my front lawn. They took over that chore when Jason left town. They "oversaw" every step of the project. They still call to tell me every time my sprinklers go off at the wrong time, or every time a family member stops by my house. As they always say, What are neighbors for?

remember when we had a back yard?

One of the reasons we are still in Utah.

The upside is Mason enjoys watching the tractors.

The downside is it's kind of taking FOREVER!

it was worth it...

Here's the disaster cake.
It was for the May birthdays on my side of the family which included MASON!
Of course, I played favorites and geared it towards his interests.

Happy Birthday Kristi, Ben, and Ayden!

If ever...

If ever you think: tonight would be a great night to make a super amazing cake for the party tomorrow...
DON'T! Try to remember that big projects and late nights don't go so well when your husband isn't around to rescue you.

If ever you think: I should bake these three layers at the same time since they fit...
DON'T! They don't really fit and will take forever to bake.

If ever you think: These two pans seem really full but that's okay because it will make really nice round tops...
DON'T! You will learn the hard way that pans-too-full equal huge overflowing/burning messes.

If ever you think: It's really smokey in here...
YOU SHOULD! Because it is!

If ever you think: Open the window and light some candles...
YOU SHOULD! It will help a little but the smell will still make you throw up. Seriously!

If ever you think: I should clean this up now because it will be easier when it's still hot...
DON'T! Almost everything catches fire when contacted with that degree of heat and now you have melted utinsils and ashes in your sink.

If ever you think: It's not that bad...
IT IS! Your whole house, your hair, all the other layers of cake, and even your sheets smell like burning death.  



Jason I miss you.

testing...testing...

Hello? Can you hear me? I am writing from my beautiful new computer. Do I sound different? It feels different. The screen is bigger than my microwave. It's fancy. It's fast. It's gorgeous. I think I will name it Hanns.


My brother Jeff built the computer for me. He explained the process as "complex Legos". I watched him for a while, pretending to know what a CPU is and what a motherboard does. Like a surgeon, he meticulously assembled what looked to be the tin man's innards. It reminded me of when we were little and used to take stuff apart and pretend we were making space ships and bombs. Except in the end he brought me this beautiful work of art. I love having a custom computer at an amazing price with my own personal tech support.
Thanks Jeff. I'd hug you...but....you know....

in a jam

A jar of jam from the grocery shelf is just that. A container of fruit preserves. But a jar of homemade jam! You can actually taste the love and effort put in to it. I have always wanted/feared to learn how to can fruit. I knew I would never really be a legitimate wife and mother until I excelled in preserving all manner of substances. It's a right of passage into womanhood.

I'm sort of kidding here, but honestly I'll admit to an underlying fear of inadequacy due to my lack of proficiency in this area. Homemaking doesn't come naturally to me. I cheat when I make chicken pot pie, I'll never scrapbook, and I haven't busted out the ironing board in months.
I am trying and I am learning.

My best friend Lindsey visited this past weekend and had a wickedly good time laughing at my custom throw pillows, icing lilies, and painted birdies. "WHO ARE YOU?" she scream/laughed all the way through my house. I know I have changed, but I will be the first to admit how much I love being a wife and a mother. I didn't plan on marrying young or sewing throw pillows but you learn to enjoy life as it comes. In my first year of marriage I learned that I really like to cook. Who would have thought? (Not big brother Andy who used to prematurely mourn for my spinsterhood due to lack of interest in the culinary world.) In my second year of marriage Jason bought me a sewing machine for my birthday and I found I really enjoyed that as well. No, I don't actually measure very often, but it usually works out in the end. On and on the story goes. Little skills and hobbies that I used to mock have become part of my quiet little life.

Recently Jase and I found a quiz that we took when we were engaged. We took it again and I was uncomfortable at the drastic difference in answers. For example the quiz asked 1. If you could describe Ashley in one word what would it be? Old answer: Adventurous. New answer: Domestic. 2. If Ashley could have a shopping spree in one store what would she pick? Old answer: REI. New Answer: Tai Pan Trading decor store. 3. If Ashley was stuck on a island what one item would she take? Old answer: Her Chacos. New answer: Computer. We had a good laugh, but I felt uneasy. The Ghost of Ashley past has haunted me ever since. Who was I then and who am I now? And where are my Chacos?!

My little brother once asked me not to lose myself in marriage. I'm not sure how to do that. I've always considered it sacrifice for a greater good.

When you get married you give up your independence. This is a positive thing. Two individuals naturally merge their separate lives into one. You stop thinking in terms of "I" and consider everything in terms of "we" and "us".
When you become a parent you go beyond giving up independence. You actually forfeit your identity. You don't have the privilege of doing anything on your own timetable. Your wants and needs are bumped into last place. Even the nurturing of a marriage is secondary to the physical and emotional nurturing of your children.

This is what I have learned. All of these changes are good things. It is actually how it is supposed to be. In Matthew 10: 39 we learn that "he that loseth his life for my sake shall find it". I believe this applies to what we devote our lives to while in this world. The Proclamation to the World states "Husbands and wife have solemn responsibility to love and care for each other and for their children...Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, to teach them to serve and love one another, to observe the commandments of God and to be law abiding citizens where ever they live. Husbands and wives--mothers an fathers--will be accountable before God for the discharge of these obligations."

It isn't feasible to follow that command and live selfishly. Now I am Jason's wife and Mason's mother. While going through this mini identity crisis I found that yes, I have changed. But infinitely for the better. And perhaps it is not so much change as discovery. In matrimony and motherhood I have seen glimpses of who I really am.
I do not claim that a perfectly kept house and homemade food will pave the way into heaven. Perhaps, though, it is in those acts that women can serve and be refined. In small acts of self discipline and perseverance, we gain attributes that make us more successful in the home. Success in the home can become success in the family. Happiness and unity will be undeniable blessings.

I really have come a long way. I used to spout, "When I'm married, if my husband is hungry, he should find something to eat". Nowadays I get so much satisfaction from packing his lunch and preparing hot meals. It could have been a less awkward learning process if I hadn't been so bull headed when I was younger, but back then I had no idea how much joy there was in womanhood.

This is my mother. She is the one in the apron. I believe this state of the art kitchen photo was taken at Dixie State College.
Mom and I are opposites. My mom exemplifies everything that a woman should be. She cooks up three hot meals a day, raised 9 successful children, is a supportive wife, never speaks badly of anyone, is cheerful, funny, and lets me call her five times a day. I wish I could be half as hardworking, long suffering, optimistic and thoughtful as she is. As Abraham Lincoln put it, "All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother."

My mom is my hero, example, and friend. By following in her footsteps I find myself closer and closer to personifying the mother I want to become. In my recent struggle with my new identity she's been there to calmly listen to my ranting and let's me ramble on without correction. I knew that she had the answer to my problems, but would never throw it in my face. That's just not her style.
(Finally, back to the point)
I bought a couple flats of strawberries. I knew with my skills I could either dry them or freeze them. When I found out my mom's out of town trip was postponed, I asked her to teach me how to make her freezer jam.

We had a delightful morning cutting up strawberries, measuring sugar, and solving the world's problems. She doesn't seem to care that I fall short of where I should be. She knows I am trying. She doesn't care that I seem to have changed. I am still her girl.

I am overwhelmed by the happiness I felt this morning. With my sticky little boy "helping", my husband assisting, and my mom encouraging, we made miracle jam. I know it won't taste as good as my mother's. Nothing ever does. But it was the perfect recipe to cure my identity crisis. I know I am different. I am actually better, and I will just keep trying.

Ether 12:27 "And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weaknesses. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them."

It just makes cents

I'm obsessed with finding cheap stuff. Couponing and Bountiful Baskets are only the beginning.

Even when my boy is being Captain CrankyPants and I don't dare take him to the grocery store, I will justify stopping in at some of my favorite thrift stores.

I know I annoy my mom and sisters by sending pics of every bargain I find.
I know I annoy the store employees by doing happy dances in the aisles.
I know I'm probably not saving all that much when I keep buying stuff all the time.
But I don't really care, so hand over my change.

I was feeling a bit partisan so I included the Catholic Thrift Store in my rotation.
Score! Old picture frame and a vintage Raggedy Andy for $3.50.
The Dollar Store never disappoints either.


Mason's new ride was a whopping buck fitty. I actually had no choice but to buy it... he wouldn't get off.


But my true love is DI.
Mason's Easter outfit, Jason's cupboards for his shed, my next craft project, books and toys were all picked up at DI today.

Last time I was in Richfield I ran some errands with my Father in Law, Richard. I convinced him to stop at their DI (as if it took much convincing).

Ta Da! The pièce de résistance! Always desired, but never splurged...until now!
I think it was $2.
My "new" cupcake display.

Richard was bewildered when he saw me dive head first to snatch it up. "What is that thing?!"
When I started doing my "I just saved a bundle" celebratory jig, he hid behind the tie rack.

I'm looking forward to an upcoming Swap Meet in my neighborhood. Not for the obvious reason either. I hope to lighten my personal materialistic load and maybe even make someone else do a happy dance.

Now there, I've admitted I'm a bit nuts. Aren't we all in one way or another? It reminds me of this humorous revision of the LDS 13th Article of Faith:

13. We believe in being above average, good at crafts, optimistic, and being fifteen minutes late everywhere we go. Indeed, we may say that we follow BYU football. We believe rumors about famous people joining the church, we hope to meet the three Nephites, we have endured many pyramid schemes, and hope to be able to endure all pyramid schemes. If there is anything cheap, free, sold in bulk, or given away when somebody is moving, we seek after these things.